In 1994, I used to watch talk shows (when my mom was not in the room). I remember watching a few shows where a woman had become an exotic dancer after being a nerd all through school who wanted to confront a bully. I saw another show where a stripper was being asked to choose between her boyfriend and her $2k/night “career”. While some people shook their heads in disapproval and disgust, others seemed to be calculating how much money they think they can make becoming a stripper themselves. I was 12 years old and my eyebrows were raised and my mind was calculating too.
As an Atlanta native, I have watched my city go from being known for peaches and peanuts to becoming a forerunner in the music and movie industry in less than 20 years. When you drive through downtown Atlanta, you will see propaganda for the music and film industry plastered everywhere. Atlanta has been known for the vast variety of adult entertainment as well. I became an exotic dancer AS SOON AS I TURNED 18 AND GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL. I started working in a very famous strip club and immediately saw the fast money (not $2k/night, though) and was glad I was finally in the mix.
In a city where music, movies and the sex industry are promoted on billboards, its only natural for things to evolve. Marketing to tourists in the “Hollywood of the South” have become a priority the last couple a years. In the midst of all the hoopla, a new hashtag has emerged, bringing awareness to one of Atlanta’s other lucrative industries: #SexTrafficking. Although it is advertised as “awareness“, to me, it sometimes comes off as “marketing” or “promotion“. Its like telling all the people who want to buy sex but don’t have the time or money to go to Thailand to simply visit Atlanta for all your sex slave needs.
When I go to speak at anti-sex trafficking events and tell my transition story from being an exotic dancer for 14 years off and on, there is always atleast one person who pulls me to the side afterward to tell me they would have become an exotic dancer too, only if they had a better body. Or they ask me if I think they “have what it takes” to make money.
No lie. 😐😐😐
Everytime I go to an anti- sex trafficking event and the presenter starts to discuss the amount of money the “industry” is worth, I have made it a point to watch the crowd. 👀 Some attendees of these sex trafficking events seem to be gathering data for a business plan and researching 🧐 how to get their foot in the door so they can profit from a “new, trending business venture”. Speakers at these anti-sex trafficking events are passionate about presenting information to inspire and infuriate the audience into action to help survivors.
As advocates tell their stories of horror and trauma and organizations educate the masses on the MARKET and VALUE of the sex trafficking industry, some folks in the audience seem to be in investigation mode, scribbling notes as if they were at a multi-level marketing presentation and picturing themselves as successful as the “mogul guru” decribes his or her own astronomical residual income.
While presenters are pouring out their hearts on behalf of sex trafficking victims, some folks have that same mentally calculating look on their faces I had while I imagined bringing home $2000/night as I envisioned myself as a successful stripper. They ask nonchalant questions about recruitment tactics and feign interest in the welfare of the vulnerable populations traffickers usually target.
This is why it is important to me to support SEX TRAFFICKING organizations WHO HELP THE SURVIVORS TRANSITION FROM THE TRAUMA AND ISOLATION OR FUND THE IMMEDIATE NEEDS OF VICTIMS IN THEIR ESCAPE PLANS! Paying for UBER, BUS TICKETS AND PLANE RIDES ARE EXPENSIVE! AND the last thing this organizations on the frontlines to help these people needs is money for more “AWARENESS”. I am totally convinced that many of the people who dress up and attend anti-sex trafficking events are only there to discover how to obtain “products” to supply the high demand for this billion dollar industry.
Why? You ask?🤔
Because now SUDDENLY, the people who sat with pens and pads, taking voracious notes and raising their hands ONLY to ask about the laws and penalties for pimps and traffickers have evaluated the “risks” and seem to have started a secret lobbying campaign to change some things to make it easier to get supply…
And voilà! Suddenly, women are penalized with stiff penalties and sentences for having abortions. Why? Because these unwanted, unborn goldmines will be the supply to answer this highly taboo but even higher demand. More unwanted babies born will SUPPLY the horribly negligent CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES AGENCIES with the commodities to sell and join in the lucrative market of selling children for sex. * insert someone maniacally rubbing their hands together.*👹😈
This is an observation I have made and not a stance on whether abortion is right or wrong. It is not about it being Biblical or demonic. This is not about prolife or prochoice. This, like most government regulations and endeavors, is just business. If you don’t believe me, think about how much marijuana had been criminalized in the past until they figured out a way to profit from the industry. ONLY AFTER the government has found a way to corner the market and produce this forbidden plant (with its newfound foothold in THAT industry) it has SUDDENLY been legalized and now being sold to the public in some places…as a legitimate STOREFRONT business while others languish in prison for selling less weed than they offer…
Watch 👀👀👀and see who is getting caught in child porn and exploitation rings and watch the penalties for traffickers and watch how the “laws” for victims who escape with half their mind still intact are penalized with harsher consequences for “ESCAPING” in the judicial system for attempting to advocate for themselves.*insert side eye*.😒😒😑😒😒
If you truly have a desire to help with sex trafficking, support organizations who have a heart ❤ for the survivors of this industry. 4Sarah is a survivor-led non-profit organization dedicated to help women transition from the sex industry. This is the only organization who provides scholarships to women in order to help them build confidence and marketable skills to re-enter the world as independent contributors to society. In December 2018, 4Sarah, Inc. opened an Assessment House for pregnant women and women with children who have escaped from sex trafficking.
As the Care Team Coordinator for this organization, I know the needs these women have when they call to get physical, emotional, spiritual and financial support to help them successfully transition. Donating money about awareness is nice its not the best use when so many women need money to get their identification, birth certificates, pay for groceries and other basic essentials we all take for granted. When these women leave a trafficker, they usually have nothing and have to start over and yes, their children do too.
If you would like to contribute to helping victims become survivors and thrivers, donate today http://www.4Sarah.net.
As a woman who used to as an exotic dancer, I know I will be in transition for a while. I have not been back to work in 4 years but I still feel the negative effects on my life from my years as a stripper. I started dancing in 2001 and stopped in 2014. There is a total of 10 years of pauses in between but each time I went back I had to get used to a worse work dynamic. The envelope was always being pushed and it would be harder to earn money each time I returned to the game. There were more girls, willing to do a lot for a lot less money. The focus didn’t seem to be getting money but outdoing other girls by holding customers’ attention. Customers caught on and began using this to request the dancer allow access to her body by touching and not just watching.
As the Care Team Coordinator for 4Sarah, a non-profit organization dedicated to assisting women in transition out of the adult entertainment lifestyle, my job is to help women in their transition by mentoring, connecting different resources and more importantly, helping her spirit heal and develop from the environment she is coming from. Scriptures for Strippers: The First and Only Devotional to the Holy Bible for Women in Adult Entertainment is a tool used to help fight the spiritual warfare a woman who is stuck in OR struggling to stay free from must fight to live a healthy life.
I have always wanted to sit around with women who have dealt with the same issues in the strip club and talk about our issues together. I had no one to discuss certain things with and whenever I tried to express any ideas or concerns about my work issues I was always met with either judgement or apathy. After writing Scriptures For Strippers, many women privately reached out to me because God has revealed to me how to navigate my way through the wilderness by clinging to Him. I understand the need for encouragement even if a woman is still working in the club each night and hates it.
I am so excited to announce the second IN PERSON support group for strippers hosted by 4Sarah, Inc on August 23, 2018 in Conyers, GA from 7pm-9pm. Registration is mandatory for this private event and I am looking forward to the same sisterhood, spiritual healing and support that occurred during the last meeting. We discussed how to move forward while examining our talents, abilities and gifts to transition into the multifaceted being we are.
Sometimes a woman hasn’t figured out what else to do so she has to continue doing this job until she can find another way to support herself and her family. For this reason, there is a weekly virtual support group for women who work in adult entertainment. Each Saturday from 7pm-8pm EST a conference call is held where anyone in the country can call in and get prayer, encouragement, express herself or get resources for her transition.
I am excited because I know there is a need and women will be inspired, equipped and encouraged by this call.
For more information, please contact Sayuri Smith at http://www.ScripturesforStrippers.com.
Many of you have seen the video of the radio interview shot earlier this year of Sayuri Smith on the G. Wade Radio Show.
This show has garnered lots of feedback and explained lots of what this book is, why it was written and how Scriptures For Strippers came to be. This labor of love is the first and only devotional to the Holy Bible for women who work as exotic dancers.
Get your copy of Scriptures For Strippers on http://www.Amazon.com or http://www.ScripturesForStrippers.com. Please don’t be confused by the dual cover. There are two different covers. One is for the bookstores and the other cover is more discreet, featuring the Scriptures for Strippers logo.
Check out the live radio show recorded April 2017 on YouTube. Please like and share!
Did you know The First and Only Devotional for Exotic Dancers has a channel on YouTube?
You can find the inspirational “soundtrack” to the 42 Chapters in Scriptures For Strippers. This is a playlist with gospel and inspirational songs. There is also “Lit for the Lord”, a playlist featuring Sayuri Smith’s favorite gospel rap songs. The playlist with smooth R&B sounding tracks which also glorify God is called “Relax With The Lord.”
Check out the channel! Like, share and subscribe!
Everyone knows that the purpose of the devil is to steal, kill and destroy. But there are subtle ways we may be under attack without even understanding it to be an attack. When someone is stealing from us we may be able to see it very clearly. But there are things that happened before the thief is able to take the blessing. Before anything is dead or dies, there may be some indications and we may be able to save it before it dies. When someone is behaving destructively, we may be able to prevent the enemy from destroying our blessing. There is usually some activity we are subtly invited to participate in before the loss occurs. Most times the devil needs our participation in order to achieve his mischief. After meditating and praying against attacks from the enemy, God has revealed some quite obvious attacks from the enemy that have thr potential to have a huge impact but because they are undetectable in the grand scheme and hustle and bustle of life.
First, let’s understand what subtle means.
Subtle: adjective (describing word)
1. (Especially of a or distinction) so delicate and or as to be difficult to or describe.
2. (of mixture or effect) delicately complex and understated.
3. Making use of clever and indirect methods to achieve something.
The first way the devil execute subtle attacks is to provoke you.
Provoke- stimulate or give rise to (a reaction or emotion, typically a strong or unwelcome one) in someone.
In Matthew 4:1-3, Jesus was in the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights the devil came to tempt Him. He asked him probing questions while He was vulnerable. (How strong and aware would you be after 40 days of nothing to eat or drink?) The purpose of the questions were not to make friends or learn anything but to get Jesus to destroy Himself and bring God Himself under subjection by provoking Jesus to destroy HIMSELF!
Think of all the times you have done something you know was wrong or regretted and later realized that if your response had been different, certain things would not be an issue. Maybe you would have a clean driving record if you had not been tempted to race someone who provoked you at the stop light. Maybe you wouldn’t be on probation if you had taken the high road and not choked a girl at work. Understanding how the devil provokes us is a huge key to avoiding guilt and the opposite of blessings, curses. You have the authority in Jesus Christ to tell demons and devils to flee and they must.
“Then Jesus said to him, Begone, Satan! For it has been written, You shall worship the Lord your God, and Him alone shall you serve.” Matthew 4:10 AMPC
Only when you respond to provocation, will the devil now be able to subtly or straight up accuse you.
Accuse- charge (someone) with an offense or crime.
After you respond and put your foot in the net to be trapped, now you can be accused. In John 8:3-6, scribes and Pharisees attempted to bait Jesus with a situation where they could accuse Him of a crime. This is the story of the woman who had committed adultery who they had planned to stone. What many people don’t know about this story is that she had been sexually involved with ALL who accused her! Some were upset because she had not been having sex with them EQUALLY so they wanted to punish her! The scribes and Pharisees were assuming that Jesus was like them and had participated in the same activities with this particular woman. Of course, Jesus wasn’t going to be trapped by this situation. They wanted to make people see Jesus as less than He was and if not that then at least the same as them. The way Jesus was able to exonerate the woman and set her free was to ask the men another question that many have misinterpreted. He said, “Let him who have not participated in this particular sin with this particular woman, cast the first stone.” (In those days, women didn’t have freedom over their bodies so a man could rape and woman then blame, accuse and punish her for being a victim of circumstances.)
No one could punish her without also admitting he should also be punished because they had ALL had sex with her! How dare they accuse her and exonerate themselves?! When the enemy points the finger at us and accuses us of sin that we have not committed, we must remember how Jesus saved the woman from her accusers. We must walk with integrity and trust God to deliver and redeem us.
“But as for me, I will walk in my integrity; redeem me and be merciful and gracious to me.” Psalm 26:11 AMPC
The accusation is also created to make a person defensive. When a person is defensive, they are emotionally vulnerable. Anger or sadness may distract from the facts and cause you to ACTUALLY sin. Imagine becoming indignant and angry and losing your temper about something you are totally innocent of. The devil is pulling you in and causing you to give up your rights to blessings God want to give and make a decision to destroy your own destiny.
When an accusation is stated, a curse is usually close behind. The third way the devil subtly attacks is through perceived or outright cursing you.
Curse- a solemn utterance intended to invoke a supernatural power to inflict harm or punishment on someone or something.
A situation can present itself to be accusatory and make you feel the need to look forward to punishment for the perceived sin or even punish yourself. In Acts 16:25-28 Paul and Silas were wrongfully jailed and God sent an earthquake to shake the jail and open the doors. The prison guard who had fell asleep, woke up and saw the doors open. He immediately drew his sword against himself, preparing to commit suicide because he would have been accused of allowing inmates to run free. He was prepared to punish and immediately activate the curse of death on himself because of what he would be accused of. Paul and Silas stayed and begged the man to spare his own life. He did but the devil was almost successful at killing this man!
The devil needs you as an accomplice in his mischief to later accuse you. The devil’s purpose is always to drive distance between you and God. That is why the devil keeps a record of sin. The devil has to hold something over your head to be able to point the finger and accuse you. Even by putting you in precarious situations, the devil will work with just making you look guilty. Then later he will convince you that you might as well do wrong because you’ve been accused of the deed anyway. After you have been accused, the devil will declare a curse over your life. After making you look like a cheater, you will hear demons tell you to get ready for a divorce. When you’re in trouble at work, you may hear that you should start looking for another job. The devil brings confusion and chaos. The devil always convinces the person something is a good idea at first and will be the first to point the finger at you when it’s time for punishment and consequences later. That’s why it’s important to resist the devil or tell him to flee.
“So be subject to God. Resist the devil [stand firm against him], and he will flee from you.” James 4:7 AMPC
Jesus has come to redeem us. We are saved through his death. We may come to God through the obedience of Jesus. Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. Jesus helps us understand how to be forgiven so we may know how so we may be granted forgiveness when we ask God for it. We are blessed through these efforts and brought closer to the Creator by helping us adhere to the instructions from God. When we followed the instructions for God we can easily identify when the devil is speaking or attempting to get us to do something.
Get your directions to the instructions from God by purchasing your copy of Scriptures For Strippers on Amazon or the official website today!
All rights reserved. Copyright ©2017 Sayuri Smith LLC.
After I became an exotic dancer, I was always tempted to work, not knowing how much I would make or miss out on if I didn’t go. It drove me crazy! The freedom in schedule allowed me to pick and and choose when I’d go in. I needed to make sure I rested but I didn’t want to miss an opportunity to score a big pay day.
While at work, my goal was to dance for everyone in the room at least once. While talking to customers, they began to make proposals for me to leave the club with them in order to make extra money. I always thought about Cold Case Files and Unsolved Mysteries and ran from the people who attempted to bait me with promises of money, fame or anything. I was afraid of the unknown. But after a while, I began to wonder if I was shortchanging myself. I wondered if I was missing opportunities because I was so afraid of what I didn’t know. Every time I thought about how harmless a guy seemed, I thought of the movie, Silence of the Lambs, where a serial killer would pose as a man in need of help, complete with an arm cast only to abduct women and skin them.
What are the temptations exotic dancers face? When customers want to hear something good, dancers are tempted to lie to keep the money flowing and fulfill a man’s fantasy of getting his way with a beautiful woman. When a customer leaves his money or credit card out, a dancer may be tempted to steal it and take a few days off work. The temptation to trade sex for sexual favors for money will present itself a few times everyday. When a customer pressures a dancer to meet him after she leaves work, depending on who she is hooked up with, she can be tempted to have the customer set up to be robbed. Sometimes robberies go bad and someone ends up getting hurt. There are temptations to drink too much and use drugs to distract dancers from their reality. A fellow dancer can tempt another to fight by stealing money or customers. A patron can tempt a dancer to fight by refusing to pay her. The list of temptations in the strip club are literally endless.
The scriptures that came to mind while in these situations kept me from participating in certain behaviors and being in precarious scenarios. I always reminded myself that:
“Every good and perfect gift cones from above; it comes down from the Father of light.” James 1:17
This means I didn’t have to anything people were trying to get me to do. I was there to make money off my dance skills and that was it! I didn’t feel the need to do anything extra in order to make it.
“But those who crave to be rich fall into temptation and a snare and into many foolish (useless, godless) and hurtful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction and miserable perishing.”
1 Timothy 6:9 AMPC
This scripture revealed the trap that temptation is. I didn’t want to end up in ruin, destruction or die a horrible death just because of a few extra dollars.
“For the love of money is a root of all evils; it is through this craving that some have been led astray and have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves through with many acute [mental] pangs.”
1 Timothy 6:10 AMPC
This scripture is one of the most misinterpreted of all. The love of money is the root of all evil. Money is not evil. I’ve seen some people do some crazy stuff for money. The love and desperation for it is so dangerous in the strip club. Pimps and predatory customers lure dancers into dungeons using their own desire for money to make them prisoners. This scripture also speaks on the negative toll the love of money takes on one’s mental health.
Everyone has a plan to eventually leave the club. Don’t be tempted by things that sounds too good to be true and don’t allow or develop the love of money to rule you. Pray always and know nothing last forever. Don’t allow desperation to make you feel like you have to do something crazy to get your needs met. Pick up your copy of Scriptures for Strippers from Amazon or visit the http://www.ScripturesForStrippers.com
“And lead (bring) us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.”
Matthew 6:13 AMPC
All Rights Reserved. © Sayuri Smith LLC. 2017
In my determination to not be the recluse I once was, I have been making an effort to get out of the house and find good, clean fun with women are unashamed of their relationship with God. In my search, I stumbled upon this awesome network of women who are not only believers in God, but movers and shakers in the Body of Christ! After perusing my Eventbrite app, I discovered a woman named Tamara Diahann. She hosted an event called The God Girl Expo in Lithonia, GA. Mrs. Diahann is one of the biggest bubbliest, most positive people I’ve been around in a while. She is also the Community of Christian Women’s Founder with a mission to assemble women of God to execute the mission, vision and purpose of kingdom business.
I made some great connections with women who are operating in their purpose and executing the mission of building the body of Christ. I’ve encountered a beautiful woman named Aqueela Maddox, The Inspirationalist, who inspires others with her transparent testimony and highlights redemption, forgiveness and reinforcing the importance of practical application of the Word of God to one’s life. She is also a marketing expert hosting a workshop on how to “Brand Your Brand”.
I met a woman another woman name Corendis Hardy, owner of Avant-Garde Books where she offers uplifting literature for African American children. She will be hosting The African American Booklovers Expo in November 2017.
The Community of Christian Women hosts 2 recurring monthly events. The Coffee and Conversations Brunch happens every 2nd Saturday from 10 am until 12 noon at the Laughing Goat Cafe located in downtown Decatur, GA.
The God Girl Gathering is a fun girl’s night which takes place at the House of Victory Christian Church located at 4542 Evans Mills Rd. Lithonia, GA 30038. Festivities begin at 7 pm until 11pm every 4th Friday of the month. There was tasty treats, entertaining games, loud laughter and Godly conversation! I was so happy I brought my sister and we both look forward to the next God Girl Event!
I encourage you to mark your calendars and check out these events to include some non-judgmental fellowship with females of faith. Check out the website http://www.HelloGodGirl.com for more info! I look forward to meeting you there!!!
All rights reserved. Copyright 2017 Sayuri Smith LLC.
On my journey to experiencing God through fellowship with His people, I have come to learn about different Bible studies, church services and events with the purpose of drawing people nearer to our Creator. My calendar is full of prayer calls that happen over the phone, evening Bible studies and the different times church services start for Sunday morning service.
There are recurring events that happen every other week or monthly that I plan to go to but I sometimes lose track of time or get the event days mixed up. This was certainly the case with the catching up with The Bridge KickBack, a millenial-led church service that takes place at Nancy’s Pizza in Atlanta, Georgia every other Monday at 7 pm.
I discovered this service after first falling in love with the gospel trap music artist named Glo and his album, “Trapping Out the Church”. I absolutely loved every song I heard (and added to my Lit for the Lord playlist on YouTube) but my favorites are “On the Water” and “By the Twos”. I had to post part of a song on my instagram page and found GLO to tag him. I was excited to learn that he lived in metro Atlanta and actually did a song, “Worship for The Hood”, that shouted out my old neighbor in Riverdale, GA. After doing a little bit more investigating, I saw that he was a part of a movement called The Bridge KickBack where young people gathered together to have praise and worship and uplifting words about Jesus Christ after playing some fun games and having some gut busting laughs.
Last week, they also had a very unique online event called the Unapologetically Me Conference that included panel discussions, testimonies and inspiration from different people from various races, backgrounds and lifestyles. They discussed your identity in Christ and image versus reality among other things starting on Instagram and leading to Youtube for the full video. I was blessed by this insight and appreciated the testimonies shared! This made me vigilant about keeping up with and catching the date for the next bi-weekly event so I can finally experience this event in person.
My youngest sister is a bonafide millenial and I immediately thought of her when I saw the clips of people talking about their experiences with the Holy Spirit during this unadulterated, unique encounter with God. I was excited to plan to go to this event with her. My children came as well. My daughter enjoyed dancing to the familiar gospel trap music and my son dominated the Connect 4 table. We also enjoyed some authentic, delicious Chicago-style deep dish pizza that didn’t break the bank!
I was beyond excited to experience the spirit-filled altar call where the ladies gathered and were encouraged to embrace, pray with or intercede for each other. There was a real sense of sisterhood and family in the room as we all lifted up the name of our Lord together. I was on mommy duty with my baby girl but God still afforded me an opportunity to pray with a lady in the back of the room. She was eventually encouraged enough to go to the front of the room and join the altar call.
There was a round table discussion and a panel discussion on different spiritual topics like insecurity and identity in God. I was amazed at how the Holy Spirit came in as we Milly Wopped and did the Running Man for the Lord. I am not easily impressed but my expectations were definitely exceeded as I didn’t expect the move of God to be so strong. I listen to gospel rap a lot but I now know that the Holy Spirit will visit any place where it is welcome. I love praising, worshipping, glorifying and loving on the Lord and it felt good to be in the company of so many people who were on the same accord. There was no judgment, negative vibes or quenched spirit in this place…Praise God! I totally recommend this event to anyone who wants to invite someone to church but know they won’t show up to an actual church building. It is clearly an awesome alternative to Bible study that will keep you engaged, entertained and energized! I am grateful that the folks at The Bridge KickBack for allow themselves to be a great representative of what the church should be, people who bring God WHEREVER they go and are unapologetic as they do it!
This is a blurry picture but I was excited to take this selfie with my favorite local gospel trap artist, GLO! I had an absolute blast at The Bridge Kickback! I look forward to the next event and invite anyone in Atlanta who would love to experience the spirit of God OUTSIDE the 4 walls of church. Be sure sure to check out my homeboy and brother in Christ, GLO. Follow him on Instagram @Gloman1. Make sure you stay tuned to find out about the next event by following @TheBridgeKickback at Nancy’s Chicago Pizza located at 265 Ponce De Leon Ave NE A, Atlanta, GA 30308. Hope to see you soon! Follow me on @SayuriSmith to learn about unique positive events in Atlanta and beyond! Be Blessed!
All Rights Reserved ©Sayuri Smith LLC.
As a woman attempts to find herself on another path through life’s journey, she may experience desperation. Many people imagine that in order for a woman to become a stripper, she had to be desperate in the first place. Many times that’s not the case… it wasn’t for me. As a child, I loved dancing and wanted to dance for money when I grew up. It was very simple to me but of course, it wouldn’t be that simple.
I did grow up and became a dancer in a strip club. When I came in contact with customers who thought they could take advantage of me or exploit my position as a stripper, it disturbed me very much. Customers who tried to make deals or negotiate prices of dance performances because they assumed I was desperate for money. This was extremely offensive and was one of the worst parts of dancing for me. I wasn’t desperate for money but I was there to earn it. I soon started to recognize how the devil attempts to use the spirit of despair and desperation against strippers.
For me, dancing was supposed to be a lucrative, fun, care-free endeavor that allowed me to showcase my ability to dance that I later learned would also require me to expose my body. Those two things were hard enough to do but when the predatory customers and even some times club management impose their sexual desires on dancers based on their warped, disgusting sociaopathic personalities, the job turns into something totally different. It is important to note that being desperate is the last thing you want to be as an exotic dancer in a strip club.
Although I know being a desperate dancer is dangerous, it didn’t prevent me from becoming desperate. Coming to work everyday and dancing my heart out was a dream come true at first but then it began to wear down on me and I was desperate to get escape. All of my other goals and aspirations were put on the back burner and dancing was the only thing I had. I had dropped out of court reporting school which was another one of my dreams and also was my ticket out of the club. I scrambled to become anything other than a dancer and became desperate to escape the club. I would have panic attacks when it was time for work and I was desperate for peace in my mind. I was desperate for a vision for my life. I was desperate to be free from spiritual weakness and emotional instability. No matter how desperate I got, I never saw the devil as an ally. I didn’t turn on myself and allow the devil to use me against myself. I had negative self-talk and put myself down a lot and realized the devil was making me punish myself but I didn’t allow the devil to convince me to use hard drugs and alcohol as an escape.
Let us test and examine our ways, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40
I was reading the Bible and trying to be encouraged but it just wasn’t working. I was prescribed pain medication for my debilitating chronic back pain and was afraid I would start abusing my medication so I would only take half of the pills. I knew I was trying to kill my pain but the desperation was causing depression, which brought isolation, which brought loneliness and eventually a spirit of suicide came over me.
When I finally got into a church, I was relieved. The pastor was prophetic, which means he spoke the Word of God into the future of the congregation. The words spoken over my life were invaluable and that’s when I learned how to implement the strategy and power of the spiritual weapon (the Bible) and fight spiritual warfare. I became desperate for God and that desperation saved my life. This negative word became the activation of my faith. My desperation for a way of escape from my financial dependency on the strip club to provide basic needs for me and my young son. I was desperate for God to reveal his PLAN for my life. It was my decision to start working in the strip club and God had protected and preserved my life through it all. I was grateful that I had been blessed enough to live my dream as a dancer, I would never have to wonder what would have been. I was grateful to God that I had the experience I had but I was sure that this lifestyle wasn’t the PURPOSE for my life.
Many people debate with me about bringing God into the life of a stripper but I DO NOT CARE!!!!!! NOBODY can tell me God’s hand has not been on my life…or any other exotic dancer’s life. I refused to allow the devil to convince me I was desperate inside the club. But the truth was, I became depressed and felt myself slowly deteriorating and self-destructing.
I had never paid attention to denominations of churches but with this being a prophetic ministry, the altar calls literally spoke life into me. At the end of each sermon, the pastor would ask if anyone needed prayer and I went to the altar every week. I didn’t have to say anything. These people just prayed and laid hands on me. I always felt a little bit lighter as I held on to each positive, prophetic word spoken over my life. I remember one time the pastor’s wife said, “You will help thousands of women. You are an overcomer. Your story will set so many free.” My life was falling apart as I had anxiety attacks and dealt with bouts of very deep depression from my emotional and spiritual exhaustion from being a dancer. To this day, those words ring in my mind and I am floored at how good God has been to me. I began to read the Bible, fast, pray and seek instruction from God through meditation. I began to hear from God and follow His directions. It was a horribly hard road to ride but I eventually did leave the club. I got another job. But that wasn’t the end. My desperation for change and living in the purpose of God made my journey in my faith walk possible. I didn’t want to go backwards and the only thing that kept me forward was my desperation for a new lifestyle.
“…I am the Lord your God, Who teaches you to profit, Who leads you in the way that you should go.” Isaiah 48:17 AMPC
Nobody ever aspires to be a crack whore, alcoholic, or prostitute but devil-inspired desperation is the gateway to these dead-end traps. I pray that anyone who is working as a dancer, prostitute, escort or WHATEVER turn to GOD today. He made you for a purpose that you are NOT fulfilling. The good news is He will accept you back. Let your desperation work for you and not against you. He is waiting for you. If you want God to speak into your life, get in the Word of GOD. He will meet your needs better than any man, club, pimp or “friend” ever could. Get to the source! God is your supplier… The REAL plug!
“And my God will liberally supply (fill to the full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19
If you don’t know what to read, get your copy of Scriptures for Strippers from Amazon.com or from http://www.ScripturesForStrippers.com. I pray you find a peace and joy again.
I’m praying for you.
Photo Credit: “Do Monsters Dream” @kirzart on Instagram https://www.KirzArt.com/
Check out the church I was telling you about in this blog post at https://www.nexlevelchurch.com/
Check out this song by Byron Cage… It explains everything perfectly!
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